Beautiful stillness

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audentes fortuna juvat: September 2004

ABOUT ME:

chalkleight

chalkleight

Los Banos, Laguna, Philippines

usually first impression s'kin mataray,masungit and the likes..uhm,sad to say totoo un kc hndi ako msyadong sociable unless there's something in one person that i really like..sbi ng mga close s'kin good listener dw ako but i think im better in ignoring what they are saying pero when i feel n kylangn mo tlga ng mkikinig sau game ako lalo n kung nkakarelate ako s topic mo..'yoko s mga self-proclaimed..those who say a lot 'bout themselves (who cares 'bout them,anyway?) hehehe..trip ko mga humorous kc moody ako..another thing 'bout me is ung temper ko..uhm,it's always at the edge, u knw what i mean..if u nid 2 knw more basahin mo mga testi s'kin kc im sure they say a lot of things 'bout me.. :]

https://www.blogger.com/profile/15896205344583116855

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

worst day!damn this conscience!!!

worst day!damn this conscience!!!

thursday....for, i think, five times..i snoozed the phone down (the only use my cp provides!)as i dragged my feet down the floor, i remembered last night how i tried to avoid speaking with mj, danes and pamy just to be able to study in chem16-lab,(if one can call that studying) and so i studied..if one can call that studying...i know...i know it's just a quiz...but im already worried bout that one-of-the-list subject of mine..
preparing myself for a cup of coffee, i went to check out my notes again,it was actually mj's because i have none...d:)
this coffee i was talking about...well, so dumb me..i put more,or i should i say a lot?, instant coffee powder in it<3in1?>...for my brain to function,umh, more or less,actively or destructively...
then on i went with my before-7class-chores...and 15 minutes before 7am,i was with some C-1L discussing about,awh! i forgot!!! i remember a classmate even commented "S**ra, ang aga mo.." damn you!
i was expecting for this quiz but then, ms. A did not give one! i was so frustrated...i wasted so much for that ANNOUNCED quiz! atp,time,brain cells...and well, a cup of the-blackest-i-ever-tasted coffee..at least i took one...i was active...even hyper...
we performed the experiment for this day,during which, i broke one of those cheap test tubes..i was hyperctive...told yah! i never even felt the test tube in my hand because the coffee made me tremble when it was already broken, tha was when i remembered holding one...
never mind that fuckin' test tube!
ms. A let us out a little earlier before 9am..to our dorm i went,pretended to sleep while actually dreaming about James Bulataw...mj disturbed me..ate some bread for lunch and decided not to attend the class in PSY1..no one can blame me...it was raining again! i already sneezed several times i took a tablet of decolgen, and got ready to sleep until 2pm
but...
damn this conscience! damn that rain! the earlier began to talk while the latter stopped...fine!! i will go there and pretend to listen to ms. N...pretensions...good thing they were invented...
once again, i dragged my feet down the floor and work for myself simultaneously...i was already 10minutes late even before i set out to walk through the freedom park...i decided not to take the jeep because, well, there was none and i saw ms. Paper Clips..she was later than i was!
in the middle of that cursed park...i learned how karma performs its job with precision and accuracy...ehehehehe...the rain heavily poured down!!! Traitor...traitor...traitor!!!! damn it!!!!
i thought God loves me..it was all me...me...meeee!!!! how unfortunate me...
okeiz...psy1 really sucks imagine me there in the classroom soaking inside my pants!! i tried to cross through the rain just to attend the fuckin' subject! ohhh...how i love ms. N!!! she announced a quiz..
i think i deserved something for myself before 2pm..
good thing i took a cup of coffee to take me throughout the day...and of course...a candy...

chalkleight

chalkleight

raem23_sha@yahoo.com

10:05 PM

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http://cracker23.blogspot.com/2004/09/worst-daydamn-this-conscience.html

Friday, September 03, 2004

sue me for stalking?

sue me for stalking?

well, one could hve do that to me..considering my latest leisure...i was able to hve their skeds because of my stalking ability!! no wonder if one day u could hear my name with the title 'official stalker'..

just tell me why he couldn't say hi without making my eyes pop-up?
or why he couldn't wave without making my knees shake?
well, all for all of those silly matters..i told myself to behave..

chalkleight

chalkleight

raem23_sha@yahoo.com

2:01 AM

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http://cracker23.blogspot.com/2004/09/sue-me-for-stalking.html

really...so dumb of me!!!!!!

really...so dumb of me!!!!!!

7556:hi
raem23_sha: oi...elow!
7556: nsabi b sau nung ksama mo nung pumunta me lb ung pinasasabi ko
raem23_sha: ah un..oo...tpos mo n b?
7556: di pa ang hirap magbasa di ba un nacocopy?
raem23_sha: hnd nga e
raem23_sha: sayang
7556: nabasa ko plng ung simula
raem23_sha: since nung nkita ko un hnd ko n ult pinuntahan...saka n lng...
raem23_sha: nwei..ntatawa c mj...bkt dw d n lng kaw ung nagsbi..hehehehe..oo nga bkt hnd n lng ikw ung nagsabi..e di sna nagkwn2han muna tau
7556: nkalimutan ko ksi naalala ko lng nung paalis na me
raem23_sha: ui..gusto ko bsahin mo ung blogger ko...pliz?
7556: di ko alam ung site
raem23_sha: cge send ko sau later..
7556: k
raem23_sha: actuali,isa lng dun s mga entries n nandun ung gusto ko mbasa mo..wel,u always thought of me as a brave one..that entry will somehow lessen both our burden (if anything was left)..pero enjoy bsahin ung mga entries bout s hiking nmin..http://cracker23.blogspot.com/
7556: i give up..too seldom that i come up with that decision..too bad----that seldom includes this one..this one----a situation that kept me in a bottomless pit for so long..now i give up..
giving up too soon is cowardice
but hanging on too long is foolishness
7556: this one really hurts..imagine giving up something which you tried to hold on to---considering the time---it's been two years..i've been trapped in that inconsidrate snare for two years..know what's in my mind? Linkin' Park..
7556: ..I tried so hardAnd got so farBut in the endIt doesn’t even matterI had to fallTo lose it allBut in the endIt doesn’t even matterI've put my trust in youPushed as far as I can goFor all thisThere’s only one thing you should know..
i wonder how could i be so dumb---to realize for the third time this foolishness, yes, three times now, yet i still engage myself in committing the same mistake over and over..or perhaps, i won't be able to learn?
7556: so, for those who are able to read this..more or less you know what i mean..hey! this time i think it's serious..i give up..
7556: i 2 ba un?
7556: i 2 ba un?
raem23_sha: oo...bkt? ang corny noh?
raem23_sha:
7556: k naman ung poem maganda nga eh
raem23_sha: un s PE?
raem23_sha: asar tlga...
raem23_sha: kc out of 6 n pwede ko maabsent...2 n lng ang tira
7556: di ung pinaste ko sa tass
7556: di ung pinaste ko sa taas
raem23_sha: dapat mjo sipagin me s subject n un
raem23_sha: huh?
raem23_sha: hnde po un poem...noh k b?
7556: ah di ba?
raem23_sha: wla lng un...
7556: ung naka italicisize?
7556: o kung ano man un maganda cya
raem23_sha: ngaks!cge i-assume n lng ntin n poem un...lex is also reading my blog!!!
7556: ah
raem23_sha: post k nmn ng comment
7556: k try ko pag di na me bc...ü
raem23_sha: so bc k ngaun?
raem23_sha: noh b yan...nagagaya me ky jhomar!
7556: alis na me bye
7556 has signed out. (1/1/02 1:55 AM)
raem23_sha: bye..

chalkleight

chalkleight

raem23_sha@yahoo.com

1:54 AM

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http://cracker23.blogspot.com/2004/09/reallyso-dumb-of-me.html

who would?

who would?

I Dare You To Move

Switchfoot
Welcome to the planet

Welcome to existence

Everyone's here

Everyone's watching you now

Everybody waits for you now

What happens next?

I dare you to move

I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor

I dare you to move

Like today never happened

Today never happened before

Welcome to the fallout

Welcome to resistance

The tension is here

Between who you are and who you could be

Between how it is and how it should be

Maybe redemption has stories to tell

Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell

Where can you run to escape from yourself?

Where you gonna go?

Salvation is here

chalkleight

chalkleight

raem23_sha@yahoo.com

1:46 AM

109420165229875848

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http://cracker23.blogspot.com/2004/09/who-would.html